Although children ages 6-8 are more emotionally invested in their friendships, they’re not totally secure in them yet. Kids often think that relationships will end if they have a squabble with a friend or if the friend starts playing with someone else. They can become so dependent on one special friend that they have trouble joining in group activities when she isn’t around. First or second grade is also the time when kids may start forming cliques and excluding those who seem different.

While it’s not crucial that your child have a best friend in the early grades, it is important that he begin to form a few ongoing relationships. Friends help teach kids the norms of behavior and lay the groundwork for satisfying relationships later on. Even though your child is in increasing control of his social life, you can continue to play a valuable role. Here’s how:

• Foster your child’s friendships: Listen when your child talks about the kids she likes, and help find opportunities for them to spend time together. Suggest activities that are fun for both children.
• Gently expand his social circle: Encourage your child to get together with friends from a variety of places besides school,  such as day care, soccer or religion classes. This will help him feel comfortable with different kids and help him limit cliquish behavior.
• Be an occasional coach: Before a playdate, help your child think of a game or snack she and her friend might enjoy, If you hear her say or do something mean, try to help her understand the impact of her words or actions. Discuss some tactics she could use to solve the problem, and what might happen under each scenario.

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